The Broccoli’s Revolting

The broccoli’s revolting. They say it’s all our fault.
And hand in hand, across the land, they’re forming mini marching bands
Demanding oil and salt.

The broccoli’s revolting. It’s come as quite a shock.
They’re out in groups and tiny troupes dispensing recipes for soups
And little blocks of stock.

For broccoli’s delicious if you cook it really well!
Some garlic is the trick to put you under broccoli’s spell.
You can have it in a stir fry, you can have it with a roast,
And if you’re feeling bold, there’s always broccoli on toast …

The broccoli’s revolting. They’re asking to be braised.
“Don’t stand and gawk, chop up my stalk, come at me with a knife and fork!”
They shout with placards raised.

The broccoli’s revolting. They say they’ve had enough.
No longer nice, they’re throwing rice, designing war-paint out of spice
And acting really tough.

For broccoli is magical, if broccoli’s not boiled!
(In fact, the boiling method will make sure your broccoli’s spoiled.)
Try making broccoli curry, or a broccoli cheddar pie,
Or even broccoli pancakes, if you’re brave enough to try …

The broccoli’s revolting. They’ve formed a barricade.
Across the sky their flags all fly, they’ve started up the rousing cry:
“We want a marinade!”

The broccoli’s revolting. It’s getting out of hand!
No more scenes of pleasant greens, they’re turning into mean machines, they’ve got some hostage runner beans!
It’s time to take a stand!

Ah broccoli, you’re wonderful, you’re just misunderstood!
But now we know, if cooked just so, you can taste really good.
So when you serve us broccoli, you’ll never hear us say
“That broccoli’s revolting”, for instead, we’ll shout “Hooray!”