I Dreamt I was a Tea Bag
Listen to Jonathan read his poem
I had a dream the other night
in which I wasn’t me.
I’ll tell you all about it
while we drink our breakfast tea …
I dreamt I was a sausage;
commander of a flight,
upon a spaceship bound for Mars
out in the starry night.
Next, I became a muffin![Picture by Nicola Schofield]()
with egg and hollandaise,
reciting a soliloquy
from one of Shakespeare’s plays.
I morphed into a slice of toast
all buttered on a plate,
elected as the Governor
of California State
who turned into a strawberry
dressed in a thermal vest
and crampons on the northwest face
of snowy Everest.
A small and tasty mushroom
was what I then became,
tap dancing in a sparkly suit
while seeking wealth and fame.
Then as a juicy baked bean
with lots of beany chums,
I played within an orchestra
upon the kettledrums.
Until I was a tea bag
afloat within a brew,
along with Jim the jellyfish
and Bob the kangaroo.
So while we have eggs Benedict,
our fry up, toast and jam,
I’d like to know your thoughts about
how weird you think I am …
in which I wasn’t me.
I’ll tell you all about it
while we drink our breakfast tea …
I dreamt I was a sausage;
commander of a flight,
upon a spaceship bound for Mars
out in the starry night.
Next, I became a muffin
Picture by Nicola Schofield
with egg and hollandaise,
reciting a soliloquy
from one of Shakespeare’s plays.
I morphed into a slice of toast
all buttered on a plate,
elected as the Governor
of California State
who turned into a strawberry
dressed in a thermal vest
and crampons on the northwest face
of snowy Everest.
A small and tasty mushroom
was what I then became,
tap dancing in a sparkly suit
while seeking wealth and fame.
Then as a juicy baked bean
with lots of beany chums,
I played within an orchestra
upon the kettledrums.
Until I was a tea bag
afloat within a brew,
along with Jim the jellyfish
and Bob the kangaroo.
So while we have eggs Benedict,
our fry up, toast and jam,
I’d like to know your thoughts about
how weird you think I am …
About Nicola Schofield, the illustrator: Having drawn and painted all manner of things in recent years, Nicola has come to realise that illustrating children's literature is the most fun. She continues to illustrate various projects while working towards her first picture book. Nicola mainly works in watercolour and digital media and is an admin for her local chapter of Urban Sketchers, often to be seen drawing on the streets of Berkshire.
This poem is copyright (©) Jonathan Humble 2024
About the Writer
Jonathan Humble
Jonathan lives in Cumbria. His work has been published online and in print in a number of magazines and anthologies. His first collection of poetry, My Camel's Name Is Brian, was published by TMB Books in 2015. His second poetry book, Fledge came out in 2020 through Maytree Press. His poems for children have been shortlisted and highly commended in the Caterpillar and Yorkmix poetry competitions and he is the editor of The Dirigible Balloon. His poems Masterclass and This Work is Done were chosen as the Milk House Poem of the Year at the end of 2022 and 2023.
