Advice from My Grandfather
Never run in stockings
Never slice your soup
Never let the cat out
Into the chicken coop
Never slap a statue
Never steal a stole
Never eat a feather bed
Unless you eat it whole
Never cut a caper
Into more than seven parts
Never cheat at checkers
Don’t play fair at darts
Never tickle serpents’ feet
Never water weeds
Don’t weigh an inch against an ounce
Or balance words with deeds
Never feed a favour
Never freeze a cold
Never dance on cellar doors
Never gild your gold
Never tie your nose in knots
Or gargle with hot glue
And never take a fool’s advice
On what never to do.
Never slice your soup
Never let the cat out
Into the chicken coop
Never slap a statue
Never steal a stole
Never eat a feather bed
Unless you eat it whole
Never cut a caper
Into more than seven parts
Never cheat at checkers
Don’t play fair at darts
Never tickle serpents’ feet
Never water weeds
Don’t weigh an inch against an ounce
Or balance words with deeds
Never feed a favour
Never freeze a cold
Never dance on cellar doors
Never gild your gold
Never tie your nose in knots
Or gargle with hot glue
And never take a fool’s advice
On what never to do.
This poem is copyright (©) Daniel Galef 2024
About the Writer
Daniel Galef
Daniel is a student and a teacher and a writer and a reader. His writing for children has appeared in Spider, Caterpillar, Crow Toes, the Balloons Lit. Journal, Orbit, Spaceports and Spidersilk, and Light. His first book of poems, Imaginary Sonnets, was published in 2023 by Able Muse Press. He lives in Cincinnati in the U.S., where he writes and teaches mathematics.